luv n hates

2006-02-05T11:07:00.000-08:00

Sometimes,
looking back at certain stuffs made you seemed so foolish.
Its time for some silence now.
goodbye my blog.

2006-01-16T06:23:00.000-08:00

Sighs
i hate to sound 'pessimistic' too
but the fact is,
i'm not happy deep inside.
i'm much disappointed,upset over people and stuffs.
i wonder if i'm right. .
If you[whoever] could really listen,
instead of making wild guesses or assuming that its far-fetched compared to so and so..
or thinking that-'ahyahs,its okay and nothing one lar...',
I'd not feel like this now.
You think i'd like anyone to hear those miserable cries?
Nah..c'mon!
There's really much more than what you see or thought,
don't try to be a smart alec aights.
No one understand more than myself even tho,i'm a lil off too.
However,
there are certainly rainbows too laaa >.<

2006-01-11T07:21:00.000-08:00

Do ya know how much i miss you?
Does anyone know what's been on my mind that's strangling me slowly to death each night?
Does heaven knows how much he could help me by just blessing me with a more worries-free life?
sighs.
Nothing's been really right.
I don't know what i'm doing,
I don't know if i'm well.
I feel so helpless,lost and useless...
I certainly needed more care and support !

2006-01-08T09:03:00.000-08:00

Lost my hp today.
Terribly upset,
been really down on my luck this year.
i hope that's it.
So much things in me and i don't know how to say or let it out.
Its only late in the night i'd silent my tears to sleep.
Nobody,nobody knows what's in me..
The sadness and problems i'm facing in my house and life.
i don't blame anyone for whatsoever,
its a challenge i guess.
I'd only wish for happiness,health and peace.
And yes,
i've never forgotten about him at all but i've to put it aside.
Misses and wishes,questions and doubts..
and at the very last,
its still happiness i hoped for all.
i'm really sad..
over many many stuffs!
Whoever sees these and could help me out?
no,
no one !
i've only myself to depend on.
i believe over time,
i'll be stronger and more independant.
-cries-

2006-01-05T09:16:00.000-08:00

i don't know what is it,

that makes me feels like this!

Just wanna keep quiet bout stuffs already.

Maybe one day,

you'll find a changed me~

There are bound to be unhappiness deep under everyone's heart.

-Life-

2006-01-03T07:00:00.000-08:00

Things in life can be really unexpected.
Therefore,i hope everyone can learn to treasure every now and then.
I was supposed to worktoday but halfway thru the journey there,
i was certain i could not make it,anymore!
The furthest i got to was bedok mrt station when its supposed to be bugis !
I kept vomitting and vomitting till my legs turned weak and that i could hardly stand.
Helplessly,i called dad up as i really needed help then.
He brought me to see a doctor without hestitation looking at the condition i'm in.
The doc then gave me a jab that is making me sort of handicapped now~ -.-''
It might be food poisoning,gotta see these days's condition.
Sighs
I was so weak after so much vomitting that i became so pale and cold.
I could hardly even stand.
Everythg looks so blur..
And my dad had to carry me-a 16 going 17 years old 40+ kg me !!
can ya imagine?
Thanks dad~!
Health is really one thing that's above all,dudes.

I'm somehow disappointed.
Well,
mayb i've expect too much or thought too deep into stuffs bahs.
Whatever,
May this 2006 be a smooth sailing and wonderful year,i hope!

2005-12-29T00:38:00.000-08:00

Went rush last night after a long time i'll say.
still the same,hahs ~
I'm off these days and i'm planning if i should change a job or whatsoever.
so many things i wanna do and get but there's kindda much restrains.
=(

i'm very vexed by so many stuffs that i could hardly name.
sighs
how nice if life could be smooth,ever smooth!
we shouldn't trust too much but we also shouldn't distrust.
-its a contradiction ain't it?-
i hope we can all be true and not pretentious-just you!
Life may then,
be with more sense of secure.
There's alot that i kept in my heart,
don't make me pour it all out cause there'll be too much emotions for you to handle.
Time past,
Things changes and we've just have to adapt and go through it all.
what hurts most is when the closest becomes someone you don't know anymore. .

Too much,
there's too much in the world to complete my feelings and thoughts.
i'm not trying to be a philosopher,
its just how i feel-be satisfied and treasure every now and then.

2005-12-24T20:49:00.000-08:00

Its christmas and i've to work

-.-''

sighs

joys and sadness = drunkness?

anws,

merry x'mas dudes!

2005-12-23T17:46:00.000-08:00

So darn tied up by work,unwillingly.
this year's santa probably not for me~!
MY comp's recovered,finally.
anws,
i'm so used to not bloggin that io don't know what to blog and how to go about stuffs.
well,
just don't worry,be happy dudes.
>.<>LOL!
glynnis...

rather disappointed
rather delighted
rather worried
rather die ~
hah !

2005-12-10T21:26:00.000-08:00

Smiles after tears and tears after smiles.

2005-11-27T00:25:00.000-08:00

My computer's still down and i'm so freaking lag to blog then.
been rather tired and restless recently.
running to and fro from chalets and so.
hasn't got my allowance ..gosh!!
anws,
my cousin's here with me these days..
*hugs*
i'm getting alil bad-tempered?
PMS yeah.

i've insomnia i reckon.
argh!
i feel so much unhappiness at times really.
sighs.
nobody can really understand cus they ain't you at all..
be glad of what i have,
that's what i'm doin now tho.
there's many things i wanna do and say but ....
i'm getting nowhere.
to all peeps:
be truthful and nice.
dont get too selfish.
there's already loads of cruel facts to accept in life ,
dun add on !

2005-11-19T21:30:00.000-08:00

These days was unlucky for me i'd say;
first,i fell onto a pool of mud.
secondly,i woke up at 7.50AM for my paper when its starting at 8AM
gosh~
and so on. . .
-.-''

went swimming today
and going to study science later on
-.-''
tired 'tired

i don't understand why
why dad,mum..
why are you both like this?
and my brother,
why are our relation so strained?
sighs
i just wants a simple and happy life,can't i?
maybe we just can't be nice on the outside..

2005-11-14T22:50:00.000-08:00

My day out with sweetie -xiang !
=D

The lane back to childhood. . .

Mr bean gave me these ! xP

she's very ''HOT'' =D

Barney Barneyyyy!!

c'mon,fighttt !

Sha La La , sha la la .. take my school bag going school ~

i'm 're-formed'..wahahas !

pictures speaks more than words..=)

2005-11-12T13:55:00.000-08:00

Went to club yesterday..
-.-''
again,what a day !
but alright lar...
^.<
went party world after clubbing
hahs..
there was,
Me,shu xiang,jane,ade,ting,jun,lun and later on,
a kind driver 'ah boon' and a fren of his.
=P

went kallang airport for 'breakfast' with lun and jane and meet up with shu yi at there.
He..haiyos..ke lian~
get over it soon,brother ! >.<
Dint sleep the wole night till now,am still at jane's hse.
we're going for a swim at se eun's hse..
LOL!
cheers buddy ~
=D

sighs
i don't know what to say already.
i swallowed all the words up for too long..
its fading away but the pains and disappointments is getting deeper..
friends and family-your happiness and sorrows; if not handled with care..
whatever !
RAH!
sighs
i appears cold but i'm very affected indeed.
i'm not sure of myself...
really not...

took on the way 'walking' to boat quay !

At Ms 'Bak kut te' coffee house'..[jun'xiang'ade]

[ jane'lun'me'ting ]

2005-11-09T18:55:00.000-08:00

headaches !!
didn't do well for my papers so far i'd say even if its much easier compared to prelims.
sighs
where would i end up at?

sometimes,
really feels so sad and alone.
when no one could understands you and worse still,
when you yourself don't too.
The pains deep within the heart,
the tears and fears hidden inside...
the disappointments and unbearables...
sighs
but i'll stay optimistic
=)

2005-11-08T06:55:00.000-08:00

hasn't slept for 2 days
-.-''
and i'm having my o'levels currently.
RAH!
getting worried and paranoid..
what happens if i fail?
argh!
so last minute and alll...
Nevertheless,
good lucks and all the best to all o's candidates =D

as for my more personal life,
its complicated;
in the sense of my feelings and thoughts etc.
well,
am in a rush to go school for my o's and thus,
i shan't elaborate any further.
life is full of unexpected-s..
hahs
>.<

2005-10-31T13:26:00.000-08:00

been a long time,

maybe for me,

since i've updated my blog as my com is down.

-.-''

hmms,

o's in less than a week and i'm still fooling around.

went for bbq,

geylang for supper,

fisherman for drinks and all the sleeplees nights going wild outside.

sighs

i know i shouldn't continue like thiss..

sighs

would most probably fail my o's like this man!

anws,

i'm lazy to blog further..

take care folkss !!

2005-10-23T04:38:00.000-07:00

Just reached home now at 4am+
went tg rhu for bbq. .
gosh!
o'levels are really near.
Pals,
we've to start on our studies already pls.
stop having plans lerhs yea~
still leading a 'vampire' life . .
-.-''

STUDY~!!!
>.<

Sometimes i'll just think bout it.
i can't control the thoughts in my mind.
i really wish to untie the knots in my heart.
but,
whats the point now and how??
Really wish to know why and loads more.
i feel more and more close to losing you,as a friend,as each day pass by.
Maybe i shall just let it be bahs.
Time will heal my internal wounds.
RAH!
Why am i still dwelling on it??!
=[

2005-10-22T15:58:00.000-07:00

Went for a game of badminton yesterday
and went down beforehand to settle a 'kids' problem at 800+
-.-''
later on in the night,
we-xiang,ivy,ade,jane,lun,ting-
went down to to fisherman.
-.-''
so many things happened.
don't wish to mention much nor elaborate.
Our friendship went under a test.. ..
Just wanna conclude that ::
eternally buddies will never leave each other in the lurch!
For the first time,
we shouted and wanted to use violence at own people.
sighs.
maybe we were all too agitated and tired,
too worried and upset bahs.
And now,
my whole body is aching.
RAH!
guess its the same for the rest yeap.
Take a good rest all.
and Ting,
you've let it out that night.
don't let the same thing happen for the same reason ever again.
walk out of it.
drinking and crying,
dwelling over it wouldn't help anything.
family and,i'd dare to say,ebudds,are still the best!
take good care.
we love each other loads indeed.

some pics taken !

2005-10-21T23:58:00.000-07:00

i'm begining to feel that i've lost things that can't be found.

i feel so empty within me,

Aimless,without a direction.

2005-10-18T19:25:00.000-07:00

forced myself up and took a cold bath to wake my mind as well.
went to school for the graduating ceremony.
well,
so many speeches and all.
nothing much.
ivy,ting,xiang,lyn neva come.
=(
hmmms...
took photos and short video clip of our ' doings '
*giggles*
i'll miss all those days.
study hard and all the best,peeps!
may our friendship last.

hia ah hia~ LOL

viewing our last video clip of crimes in spf =D

c'mon,let's do it once more.

No,don't shoot me! xP

sobs
The more likely to be seperated after graduation friends are not taken.

2005-10-18T03:12:00.000-07:00

celebrated jane's 16th birhday at marina south
steamboat-ed
=D

There was::
shu yi, hailun,jane,me,guinan,ivy,shu xiang,ade,ting and
se eun[left]-not in pic.

went golden mao after that and just reached home.
graduating ceremony in school tomorrow morning.
hope everyone will go and let's do our 'lan jiao' daiji once more...
*laughs*
yawns!
better get some sleep lerhs.

2005-10-16T21:50:00.000-07:00

watched The skeleton key on fri,
not bad..
went singing at katong yesterday,
for a pathetic hour.
-.-''
went eun's house to do some studying today!
well,
i'm prepared to be dissapointed by my o's results.
sighs
hope,
i'll be able to turn things around fast enough.

every begining has an ending and vice versa.
its true.
something that you're doing now will becomes a memory in an instant.
so,
'cherish' is the key to not regretting.
you can never turn back time.
however,
i'm not really doing so.
-.-''
whatever,
i'm tired.
silent is a temporary way to move on smoothly as time pass.

i just don't want to lose a friend i placed into my heart,
was i wrong?
-endless wonders-
anws,
i'm still on the right mind.

2005-10-14T20:20:00.000-07:00

i'm so nocturnal that you could imagine.
-.-''
not frequently at home lately.
been overnight-ing like i've no home.
should i change that?
i'm still,
not getting down to studies.
sighs

2005-10-14T06:05:00.000-07:00

my god
i didn't sleep again.
spent the night convincing myself that o's are approaching in less than a month
and attempted to do some studying.
and i'm now going off to bedok for breakfast
with shuyi !!!
-.-''
oh,
shall wonder how much i love food.
;X

-gosh-

2005-10-13T16:00:00.000-07:00

sometimes i'm just so sick of things and people.

it can be anyone..

you can see this in one's actions,hear from one's mouth, and realize even deeper from their thinking.

so tired,really.

just let it be.

i don't know what to do and how to help or react.

sighs

everyone is bound to have the goods and bads in them just that sometimes,

the flaws really puts me down alot.

i've been really cool and tolerant on such stuffs already.

i don't see the need to be too calculative ;

not only in terms of financial.

well,

maybe just gotta aceept that,

everyone have this selfishness deep inside em',

; care for ownself much more than anyone else.

the only person who could really help you is only you yourself !

terribly upset with my results.

not really been in school and therefore,

i don't really see all my papers but i jolly well knew that i did badly.

there are supportiung evidence.

trying to close up all other distractions from now

and be fully concentrating on my horrendous knowledges on studies.

yesh!

bless me to do it,

pls!

bestow upon me the concentration's mentality.

don't wanna bother about other stuffs right now.

i think,

nothing could be more impt than getting my o's taking prepared.

lalala~

2005-10-12T23:10:00.000-07:00

hasn't sleep since last night
was on the phone with shu yi from bout 1am till bout 7am.
-.-''
wtf ~ Haas!
we met up straight at around 9am at bedok and
met up hailun as well later on at parkway and headed down to suntec.
caught a movie-darkwater-,
which was so boring.
Zzz
slacked,eat and went lun's tg rhu house for a nap.
And an hour journey of bus ride brought me home now,
at 9pm.
urgh!

okay,
that's about how i spent my day.
sighs
yes,
again,
its studies.
fark it man !
RAH!

i'm not attending school i guess and yea,
i'll certainly miss those days.
all the fun we had, fear we felt and gave[=p],dotting ard like its our school,
goody goody nerd times,pranks we played,
troubles we gave and had,jokes we often made and shared.. ...
everything!
lols
it'll always be somewhere in my memory !
its actually quite unbearable but every thing have to end.
we've to move on to the next stage of life,eventually.
So dudes,
cherish every moments !!
x)

found out that i'm in none of the pics appeared in the year book,
every year.
lols.
RAH!
why am i soooo,
not committed?
-wonders-

happy birthday dad!
=)
i love you definitely.

2005-10-11T23:25:00.000-07:00

i've moved back home !
eventually,
its where i belong.
staying over at ade's house isn't bad,
just that it isn't really that convenient yeap.
however,
guess i'll not be staying home too much either.
i don't wanna have more quibbles with em',
don't wanna face too much of these unpleasant domestic affairs
which can really affect me so much,
its just that i didn't show it out.
sighs
its less than a month to o'lvls from now and i'm still sort of fooling around,
not getting down to studies.
-.-''
went tamp to eat and slacked just now..
-gosh-
better isolate myself with my books alone,nothing else!
=X

hey pals,
i know many of us did badly,
let's work harder and acheive better grades for o's aights.
guess all of us don't wish to fail too bahs.
*all the best*
Also,
there's not much days left for us to be together in the same school already.
i know we should all treasure these lil time left to be together in school,
but it seems like we aren't doing so huhs.
We'll certainly miss the days together in springfield.
sobs

The rain pours heavily all of a sudden while i was getting home,
i'm then stucked somewhere in the middle of the way from getting to my house.
As i sat down somewhere,
waiting for the rain to stop,
i felt my hidden emotions.
And as there's no one around,
i let my tears out.
i don't wanna show it all out around to peeps,
its pointless.
Just look deep into my eyes,
there,
you'll see,
my pains.
its not for 'him' alone,
its everything in my life.
that seemed so unexpressable.

But,
for all the ones in my life,
i believe that there are reasons to make me smile too.
=)))

2005-10-11T03:25:00.000-07:00

i don't know what got into me

i'm like a car that had broke down in the midst of travelling on an expressway.

i'm so lost and afraid

and i just don't know how to express myself anymore.

and pls,

doesn't always have to involve 'him' resulting in the emotions or mood i'm having

tho,

he's part of it but listen,he's just a part of these all.

there's so much more out there in life.

sighs

anws,

celebrated gui nan's bd

grow up ler oh,brother!

2005-10-09T23:58:00.000-07:00

i think it doesn't matters anymore.

i should had let go long ago..

well,

doing so now isn't too late either i guess.

i did what i didn't expected myself to do already.

it should be enough.

i've better stuffs to bother than such frivolous stuffs.

had enough tears,i really want no more.

been sick of teary eyes to bed and teary eyes to face the dawn.

i really had enough.

can everything stop vexing me?

pls..

i'm barely hanging on.

i don't want to show my tears to anyone,anymore.

-screams-

2005-10-08T17:30:00.000-07:00

went boat quay to club at lighthouse yesterday
mainly are -me,ting,ade,jun,xiang-and some friends whom i'm not sure of.

we're the first to reach my god,
and we took the stage.
lols.

there's so many blacks and whites ' ah siaos '
*laughs*
'dancing' too exaggerated,shouting,offering beer and so..
-gosh-
and bout 4am,
we went marina south for games and slacked till morning.
wanted wait for 1st bus but xiang their friends offer to give us a lift on their bike to the mrt
and so, we took the offer as we're tired anw.
reached my 2nd home- ade's house- at bout 7+am
oh yea,
i'm alternately staying at her house and mine now.
and i just woke up while she's still snoring away.

pics that we took while waiting for ting
[-camera lady-jun] x)

i'm really worried,dissappointed and afraid.
can anyone understand?
but of cus,
i'll stay as strong as possible.

no,i don't wish to cry on the outside,anymore !
pls grant my wish .

2005-10-06T23:22:00.000-07:00

lyrics of song by kelly clarkson-behind these hazel eyes-currently as my blog's song
=D
love it and the words all..
*touches*

Oh Oh, Oh Oh, Oh Oh, Oh Oh, Oh, Oh!

Seems Like Just Yesterday,
You Were Apart Of Me,
I Used To Stand So Tall,
I Used To Be So Strong,
Your Arms Around Me Tight,
Everything, It Felt So Right,
Unbreakable, Like Nothing Could Go Wrong
Now I Can't Breath,No I Can't Sleep,I'm Barely Hanging On...

*Here I Am,
Once Again,
I'm Torn Into Pieces,
Can't Deny It, Can't Pretend,
Just Thought You Were The One,
Broken Up, Deep Inside,
But You Won't Get To See The Tears I Cry,
Behind These Hazel Eyes!

I Told You Everything,
Opened Up And Let You In,
You Made Me Feel Alright, For Once In My Life,
Now All That's Left Of Me,
Is What I Pretend To Be,
So Together, But So Broken Up Inside.
'Cos' I Can't Breath,No I Can't Sleep,Im Barely Hanging On...

*Here I Am,
Once Again,
I'm Torn Into Pieces,
Can't Deny It, Can't Pretend,
Just Thought You Were The One,
Broken Up, Deep Inside,
But You Won't To See The Tears I Cry,
Behind These Hazel Eyes!

Swallow Me Then Spitting Me Out,
From Hating You I've Blamed Myself,
Seeing You It Kills Me Now,
No I Don't Cry, On The Outside,Any More!Any More...

2x*
Here I Am,
Once Again,
I'm Torn Into Pieces,
Can't Deny It, Can't Pretend,
Just Thought You Were The One,
Broken Up, Deep Inside,
But You Won't Get To See The Tears I Cry,
Behind These Hazel Eyes!

2005-10-06T16:05:00.000-07:00

No matter what happens in life,
you've gotta move on.
time will never stop,
time will never wait,
you've to move on.
think of worst situations when you thinks that you're in a very bad shape,
that'll helps you to take things a lil easier than you are.
Time might not cure injuries,
but it'certainly wash off as time passes.

i would like to stop updating too much of me now,

i've just no wish to share too much of me,anymore.

2005-10-05T10:20:00.000-07:00

awesome,
i wouldn't say i'm totally fine now but i'm surely on the way to be healed from the blow.
hasn't made it widely known to peeps.
just don't feel like making a big fuss over it.
yes,
it hurts and i'm really sad but as time pass,
i'll be okay,
i'll certainly be . .

initially,
i thot i would need days to calm my emotions and be back on the right track but hey,
i think i'll just need a day.
*congrats to myself*

i will get you out of my mind,
it's not gonna be the same you in me anymore.
i know,
i can't let this affect my preps for o's,
i can't let this affect my way of life,
i can't.
moreover,
i've always been telling ppl not to get themselves stucked in such stuffs,
and had always been pursuading and counselling em'.
well,
guess i need to do that to myself now and hopefully,
i'll heed it all.

do ya know how hard it was to accept it?
there's just so many doubts but i don't think i'd wanto clarify it all.
i just kept wondering,
kept thinking,
kept keeping updated in my own means.
i know i shld just heck it all but its really hard to throw all aside right away.
i know i can't kept being so silly as to believe its a scam or plot,
i've to accept this cruel fact!
anws,
i really wish you happiness.
-sincerely-

going for a jog,
a walk,
a big last cry for it,
and be back on track.

there's no use crying for yesterday,
just smile for tomorrow.
i'll be fine and move on.
-stronger-i shall be.

2005-10-04T22:15:00.000-07:00

i thought it wouldn't be,
i thought it was a false alarm
but the 2nd hand evidence had supported the staement made.
i can't believe it.
i'm very amazed by the hurt inflicted on me upon it
to result in the quick flow of my tears right here ;
in front of the com.
i can't bring myself to believe it right away.
its too sudden !
i really feel the heart aching in that instant.
oh nooo,
i don't wanto kick a big fuss outta it but...

just let me recurrent myself.
i know *ebudds,and many others will be there for me.
its comforting enough.
thanks.i'll be okay after sometime.

i finally felt more on the difference btwn saying and doing.
i wan to be okay asap.
give me some time.
and pls,
if anyone finds out what's bothering me,
dont do anything.
it'll upset me even further.
thanks and pls.

i could say that this is the first time,or for as long as i could remember,
i'm like that.
i shouldn't had been so.
i've been sucha fool and i'm making myself look more like one in this state of mind.
sighssssss

2005-10-03T21:45:00.000-07:00

as expected,

i din went to school today.

i might not even get my testimonial from school cus of my poor attendance.

sighs

anws,

i'm currently at jane's house.

purpose is to help her on her maths for tmr.

idiot,

all da best yeap !

2005-10-02T23:50:00.000-07:00

went bugis yesterday in the afternoon.
- My god,the sunnn~ -
-.-''
and then to club at rush,
which was somehow by force.
LOL~
anws..
tho there was about 10 odds of us in a group but it seems like i only knew a few.
reached home at bout 4am,
slept at bout 6am
and woke at bout 2pm.
Vampire !
*laughs*

hmmms..
still hasn't started studying for my coming o's
sighs
don't think i can pass well if this continues.

i'll be moving over to ade's place soon
will it be better than i am here at my own place?
haas..
let's see then.

silly lil cousin,
cried of boredom
-my god-
silly you,
take care and i'm just a phone away if anything aights
>.^
cousin's love for life
=D

went tampines and slacked with the idiotic ade which came along eddie and henry.
-lame-ed-dot-drink-eat-
haas
what a life,again.

>.<

2005-09-30T14:40:00.000-07:00

~Loves of my life~

+ Me +

+ jane +

+ Ivy +

+ Hailun +

+ Se eun +

+ Tingting +

+ Adeline +

And together,we're eternally buddies

Did this up at jane's house and its a little messy huhs.
don't know what went wrong and all.
urg!
i'm not bothering too much bout my blog's settings lar
>.^
jane and shuyi came to my house earlier on and was intending to study but well,
its was half measured.
x)
To all candidates of O's and N's,
all the best okay,
study hard.

am too tired to go out
and so,
i stayed at home.
hurhur
Zzz
good nites fellows ~

2005-09-29T22:35:00.000-07:00

i'm so so tired.

been lacking of sleep lately

and

due to the exams on these two weeks,

i've no choice but to get my butt outta bed every morning at 6am!

Zzz !

finally,

tomorrow will be the last paper for prelims and well,

i've decided to get a self permitted leave from school next week.

as expected,

my results ain't good at all.

sighs

jessandra came knocking on my door today out of the blue and i was really shocked.

could see that things weren't right the moment i see her

and i'm really sad to hear the stuffs.

gal,

be strong aights,

i'm always here for you!

and ting too,

we love you.

don't cry,

don't feel neglected,

don't give up!

there's always tomorrow if today's bad.

ebudds will stick through thick and thin together.

*huggs to all who feels alone and down*

you're definitely not aights

>.^

2005-09-28T23:58:00.000-07:00

Went to tg rhu yesterday night till dawn

-gosh-

main purpose is to help Mr ang shuyi as much as i can on his maths

since he seemed so sincere in getting good results for his approaching N's.

well,

i was somehow alil wrong.

not gonna go into details.

anws,

had i mentioned that my grandma had moved in to my place days back?

well,

she had moved in with us and had brought her 'personnal' maid along too.

^ weee ^

i didn't asked her help for much stuffs aights,

life's as usual at home except for some chores that she willingly did.

LOL~

i feel alot like keeping my 88 year-old grandma companion these days that she's here

but,

its quite hard yea.

she has serious hearing problems and i don't know how nor what to say and do with her.

she's from my father's side which means that she's an indian

but,

we don't speak tamil alright~.

i sympathize with her upon looking at the boredom she's in which couldn't be helped

and apparently,

the difficulties in her movements.

but,

there's nothing much i could do.

And suddenly,

i had some thoughts regarding senior citizens.

haas,

and that's to :

take good care of them and try not to show any anger nor bear grudges against them

for they might leave us anytime and we wouldn't want to live in regrets and guilt yea?

be nice,

patient,

caring and loving.

been really pressurized and vexed by many factors such as :

-the inconceivable fact that my o's is coming real soon and i'm not ready at all

-the financial status i'm into -.-''

-the restrained sleeping hours that got me my panda eyes

and it goes on . . .

RAHHH !!!

i'm thinking of moving out for the time being till my o's are done!

and i've took a step to talk to my mum at least and,

it might be realised.

>.<

i've no wish to face the vexes in my family,

or rather,

i'm unable to.

sighs !

i need to be fully concentrating into my horrendous studies right now

tho i know i'll certainly take out time from the '-no time-' to play as well .

lols !

actually,

i miss my buddies tho i still get to see them often enough

but its not as before.

and the same goes to our communication.

but but but,

i have faith in our promised eternal 'steady' friendship.

it'll never blow off so easy.

^ cheers ^

:: etbudds wan sui ar ::

Ting brought her friends whom i don't know over to my place to make some cookies yesterday

and it doesn't really turned out good huhs.

Hahas !

anws,

gal,

ya ought to learn to be more thoughtful aights >.<

^.<

shan't elaborate here.

se eun and ade would probably understand as they're there too.

and the 3 of us,

karaok-ing in my room.

*laughs*

shhhhh~

as for today,

i woke up in the late evening and slacked through at home.

haas !

life's unpredicted,

cherish every moment with your loved ones.

2005-09-26T15:15:00.000-07:00

so tireddd
i simply can't get up early and sleep early despite having morning sessions for yearss
dozed off during my paper and well,
i'm probably getting 20% of the total score
-.-''
really,
i can't excel in acadamics.
sighs

haas,
ade and eun was caught by HSA officers for smoking today
-owww-
hope nothing will happen lar aights.
don't worry and meanwhile,
try quitting.
it saves us,
the underages alot troubles tho i hate to admit.
LOL!
argh!

i'm so stucked in him.
i'm digging a bottomless pit in my mind
i'm so....
RAH !
why ?
i shouldn't be like that.
i know i shouldn't and nothing will come out of these
well..
at least most probably.
sighs

so many problems sometimes that i can't breath well.
pls pls,
give me breaks..
i just wants a simple,peaceful and happy life.
i've always been talking to people on their problems
and i always thinks that it will be easy to break off on whatever stuffs in them
-as long as they know precisely what's the correct way of thinking-
and to believe in the right manner. .
its very hard accepting and letting go of some things,
i know it does.
but eventually,
we'd have to !
isn't it?
of course,
i'm not perfect too.
all humans makes mistakes,
its just a matter of learning thru mistakes.
okay!
stopp ~

haas..
what's on later?
hmmms..
hope i'll be able to REALLY study later.
glynnis,
time is running out.
i'd better treasure every minutes from now yeap?
x)
still went ktv-ing yesterday.
my god..
take a look at my drastic results when its out.
and i'll just reap what i sowed.
pathetic lil corns thats it.
sighs

not been managing my emotions right.
sighs
i'm really ~~
RAHH!
what do i want?
huh?
what am i thinking of?
starting to think that i'm becoming more and more. .
hmmms..
not as expected as what i expects me to be.

2005-09-25T17:48:00.000-07:00

RAHHHH !!
i'm so stress.
i can't take in anything regarding studies.
damn it !

that shu yi is coming over to my place now.
-gosh-
and i gotta follow him to katong for singing
-.-''
lalala~

felt quite noble
lol
i'm very tired as i've not been sleeping well
but i still tried my best to finish conversing with 2 problematic friends
hope they're alright.
so many people having so many problems.
life is always full of ups and down.
get thru it at the very end.
no matter how hard the process is gonna be,
you've to overcome somehow.
don't give up on life,
its a silly surrender.
take a rest if ya must but not quit !

sometimes,
i really don't feel like doing anything nor say anything.
i'm tired not just physically,
but mentally as well.
i needs help at times but i don't know how to call for it.
so,
alone silently,
i shall learn to get on with it.

2005-09-24T01:50:00.000-07:00

just reached home after attending jamie's wedding dinner
-she's one of our 3 familes that grew up from young tgt-
tho,we ain't really close but surely there are feelings between all of us yea.
for the first time i think,
i felt the atmosphere of a wedding.
well,
maybe becus its jamie's one ~
i felt so happy for her that tears filled my eyes.
but,
i acted really cool bout it huhs.
*gees*
actually,
i really missed our young past where we always played games tgt,
talked and gathered.
tho its only like about once every half a year that gradually became lesser now that we gather up,
its enough already.
the warmth touches my heart enough.
oh yah,
they are *-jamie,geraldine,germain-* + all the lil and olds ~
time really flies
and we too,
drifted further.
nevertheless,
they're always in my heart -bosom friends-
^ cheers ^

i'm thinking of him like 24/7
having thoughts of so and so
haas
endless hallucinations !
maybe,MAYBE,
i really liked him this time round.
time will proves it one day and if he's the one

i'm very particular bout relationships yeap.
i will never want to be with someone who doesn't gives me the 'feeling' and the sense of secure,
he ought to be mature and caring,
a humorist,understandin,
kind and true. .. . .
xP
well,
sad to say but
things don't usually turns out like what we expect it to be.
and yeap,
i don't have the courage to do anything
and i'm just gonna let it be the way it gonna be...
untill someday when i think i should and can change the way things are.
or i'll just lose it all.
this is life.
ain't set to be smooth-sailing !
get up or stay down that is.

actually,
i wonder if anyone could really knows how emotional i am,
how passionate i can be,
how i want things to be,
my feeling towards stuffs and all. . .
>.<
its quite near to impossible and i've accepted.
or rather,
i've never desire for that cus its too unrealistic.
haas.

i've many thoughts bout different people,
life and stuffs.
and i'll conclude this world to be so,
so undefinable.

2005-09-23T04:05:00.000-07:00

sighs

recently,
mood isn't good at all.
and i don't really know why !
stress of coming o'levels?
life and all..
its always like that.

am currently at airport now with
-jane,ade,jun,kaiwen,shuyi,gui nan and one more !
haas,
don't know him.
planned to study but ~~
argh !
accounts ! rather difficult when i really tries to do yea

hope i'll be able to buck up and get on with life in serene

i misses him loads
but i'm remaining cool
haas
whatever !

2005-09-22T20:10:00.000-07:00

Finally,

i did up a new skin.

however,

still not upgraded completely-

no tagboard,pics to brighten up the entries,songs . . .

give me timeee aights

would say i'm on the way to recovery now

still kinda weak but i'll be stronger as each day pass by

all dudes,take care aights

dun fall sick!

humanity is so undefined

they can get so happy and in a blink of time,

depressed or mad.

haas.

things always changes

and nevertheless,

we too.

till i really tried,

i didn't knew that studying hard is really that hard huhs.

o'levels is coming in bout one month +

RAHHH!

okay,

life's as usual.

nothing much except if i'm to elaborate on this and that

oh man,

forget it right?

i'm so into you

-gosh-

give me a break,

my friends needed that too.

>.<

i would stop these emotions flowing one fine day

its pointless for me to harp on it.

-.-''

2005-09-16T20:30:00.000-07:00

i'm sick,

VERY SICK,

still.

sighs

2005-09-15T13:45:00.000-07:00

been really sick these days

-gosh-

had a high fever of 39.8 degress

can ya imagine?

had an injection and i felt better after that

wasn't afraid,

or rather,

too sick to be.

i was like bedridden for that couple of days man

and i truly appreciate the concern from my friends and family members

esp my mum,

thanks for taking so much care of me

tho afterthat,

things became a lil ugly =(

woke up the next day in giddyness

and and,

i fainted.

-.-''

causing a blue-black on my knee cap

my dad shook me hard and i woke up in a blink of time

-phew-

i've all the symptons of dangue fever yeap

but , i doubt it is larrrr

*choi choi*

no rashes and i'm onto recovery =)

see,

i said i'll be strong mentally even tho my physical isn't

hurhur

prelims on now

-stressssss-

i'm,as usual,

not prepared !

-.-''

alright,

that's all for these days.

been spending time and home to recuperate

won't be blogging often,

haas

take care folks

2005-09-10T21:40:00.000-07:00

its sucha miracle
=)
when i dun get it,
i feel lousy.
and when i do,
i feel okay~.
-.-''
anws,
truly glad that we got connected somehow.

did as i said and worked.
tho i was really unwilling to leave my cuz' alone at home
=(
considered a bad time working this round
argh,
shoo shoo!

woke up and went tamp meet up with
jane ' ivy ' meijun ' and shuxiang...
had my dinner and *kaboom*
programmes came..
was really tempted to entertain these but argh
i'm really tired ~!

sighs
who's that girl?
she's my sister.
but why i don't seem to know her like before?
sighs
cus' she's ain't the same anymore =)
yea so good lucks to you and take care.
you want say what den say lor..
you'll always have something to say too no matter what i say ma.
hmmms,maybe reflect alil on your friendster ' who i want to meet '
sometimes,
aren't you blaming this and that etc too?
so dun say till so ~~~ bahs.
need'nt bother if you're pissed off,
i'm sorry then.
but i would like to say this lil portion of my mind out.
also,
blog or not is something personal,
don't be affected by others.
I'M TIRED TOO.
and you'll never see nor understand i supposed !~!
sighs
lastly,you're always dear to me regardless of what.
i'd always reminisce our times together.
so sweet to have you no matter what.
hope we could talk and click back,
without making appt first... ...
sighs

2005-09-08T19:20:00.000-07:00

i wanna stay home this few days!
that's what my mentality is saying but i doubt my physical would go along yea
they' always doesn't work well together.
haas
anws,
i'll still try to get them to work together.
hees

was thinking if i should go along with jane and the rest to bugis
but *yipee*
my last decision-somehow made by my dearest cuz' was a No-
and i'm rather glad that i'm willing to stay with it.
for the facts that my prelims are coming next week and i'm not in a bit of readiness'?!
and also,
i'm going broke,
remember?
haas~
-.-''

truly glad to haf my cuz' over at my place for companion for a few days.
she's coming laterrr
*big smile*

shouldn't have promised my manager to work for tomorrow's night shift
i believed i did it on impulse
cause see,
i'm regretting it now and i've no choice but to work as i've given my word!
oh man!~!
=C
well,
forget it,
just take it as i'm missing that place and stuffs ba
=)
but what minds me most is that
i'll have lesser time for my cuz' this way.
-growls-
i love her to the core simply bcus she's my only bestie in terms of relatives.
my only and loveliest cousin i'll ever have!
see ya baobeii =)
:D :D :D

nothing else i think is worth to mention already.
in my mind and heart i knows
and
that's it
=) =( =) =(

2005-09-07T19:30:00.000-07:00

well

i just reached home after being out for like 24hrs?!

-.-''

tired out

was really frustrated yesterday

everything's going wrong and its driving me crazy

its to such extend that i couldn't explain what had really happened for once aights

plannings jammed and cancelled,disruptions of line,

lost,irritating phone calls and stuffs to settle etc..

it all happened bcus' of buying 'dot'

but 'bo bian'

i need~!

sighs

went andrew's there to buy from him as usual and jane is lateeee

and i'm out in a blur cab

-gosh-

i nearly burst into tears due to all these vexes coming from all areas.

tell me

how am i to take it?

and then,

i became to be unlike me.

quiet,no expressions and moody.

but hehs'

became alright after some while

andddd

i,jane and ade went to kbox!

9pm to 2am~

went ade's hse and planned to watch dvds and all

but last min we went to hailun's hse at tg rhu

reached there at about 4+am

what the...hahas

well,been a long time since i last saw that buddy of mine so,

its worthwhile after all lar

had fun laming with all the tg rhu idiots as usual

*LOL*

oh,

poor shuyi,

his hands are disfigured by me!

sorry la

but,

you should noe better than to 'attack' me too yea~

hurhur

then went to kaiwen's hse for tuition straight from there

oh yea,i bathed okie!=)

all the way till now,

i'm just home-ed~

weeet*

later night's activity shall not be into my consideration bah

i spent money like drinking water yea

-omfg-

shan't elaborate why as i'll feel even angry of myself if i do so

yesh,

i'm near to being broke,soon!

rahh

and i would also wanto rest more and study for my coming examss!!

aights,

that's all for today.

gonna take a bathe and catch an early flight to my dreamland ,

i'd hope so!

2005-09-05T02:22:00.000-07:00

Went malaysia finally after saying for about 2months
LOL
just as i thought it to be
there was
me : jane : mum and dad:
*yipee*

was quite boring went we first went in
slept thru the roundings in my dad's car
while he does his explorations =P
but as time pass,
things became much better and i enjoyed eating alotttt
hahas
'burger',marrybrown',and so so...
gosh..i ate really much
gonna burn the fats out tmr !
shall exercise!!
once you're fat,its damn hall hard to slim down and so,
i'll never allow myself to grow fat!
tho i'm sort of halfway there.
=X
we went to a boring shopping mall
sort of called *Uf0*?
hahas..
and then to city plaza..
yea ,there looks much better ..
but the price are the same lahx..
urggg
hees
bought a skeleton top but due to my mum's strong protest,
i changed it to mcky mouse
-.-''
okie still lahs..but..argh!
why did i even bother anw?!
lame ard and went back.
reached sg at ard 12 plus man~
jammed at the custom..
glad jane was there with me to cock ard..=)
*muackies*
hurhur

planning for sentosa and its putting me off
argh
this that this that
that's the trouble when the group is big huhs.
-.-''

i finally had a lil time to think and miss you
maybe,not that lil after all.
had many thoughts over many stuffs and pp
and i think,
really,
no one's perfect.
i'm sorry,
i'm not too!

2005-09-04T02:27:00.000-07:00

hmmms
went MOS on sat in the end
was actually telling myself not to go initially but still..hehs'
w0w..its was damn hell cramped of ppl okay
ya can hardly shake your ass about aights
haas
i'm lazy to elaborate here but its quite fun and happening yea
reached hm ard 8am!
and when everyone is going to bed,
i'm right in front of my television watchin cartoon
wakakas
anws,
went elias with my mum for a haircut she had been wanting
met up with jane and ivy there too
jane came my hse and settled for dinner here in the end
lols
and she went back bout 11pm

wasting time hogging on the phone after that
for about 4 hrs?
-gosh-
-.-''
typical of girls man~
hahas
gonna change that !
hmmms..
vex vex vex arh
nothing seems to go right for me
arghh
why why why ?!
alright,
i'm lazy to blog futhur.
=)

last note::show appreciation for kindness of ppl or dunch ya regret when things turns bad.
and

[ting] i'm dissappointed by you indirectly.sighs!

miss ya dudes~
ahhhhhhhh!
i'm a coward...
=C

2005-09-02T20:52:00.000-07:00

i hate being commanded

arghhhhhh

dad'

do ya know how much i feel like a criminal being investigated by you whenever we have conversations?

well

mayb i'm being sensitive

then,what about you being unreasonable?

my fault too?

shit shit shit!!!

feeling awful~

but still,

i'd always think of what you've done for us all

and sighs

i'll keep mum bout whatever 'resents' i'm having

its hard being a kind soul

very hard

and its devastated to be mistaken to be the bad guy when you're not!!

and i'd jolly well let that whoever to continue mistaking for all i care

sad tho,but forget it.

arggggg

i don't want anyone to drive me mad

who the hell are you to do that?

-gosh-

environment and situations can really contribute alot to madness okay

rahhhhhh

oh yea,

i really detest posers,hyprocrites,backstabbers and ASSHOLES!'

urg..

just be real and nice

i think the least i expect from my friends is to be real

pls anyone,just be yourself and change wholeheartedly if ya noe you're a lousy one

isit really very hard?

i dont wan any fake facades on any of ya aights

esp when the person is so dear to me and when i'm treating him/her so nice

-.-''

what's life?

cruelty is part of it.

you've to accept it no matter how tough its gonna be.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

okay,for the most current event talk now.

superstar ~

haas

weilian is the final winner as expected

actually,there are bound to be some restrictions to groove due to his blindness

but i'm sure he'll be cured one day.

seems to me that he's really benevolent.

>.^

well actually,i thinks whoever had that courage to take a part in this project is already a winner of his/her own

hope all of them will treasure the affinity to get to know each other

and the opening of a new life in them ever since.

keep it up all of ya.

the nobles in a way =)

those being kicked out,dont lose hope.

least you've gained a great experience yea.

those who is talented too but is in the wild outside,

do grab the chance in future if any kaes.

pluck up that courage in you to change your life bahs

hurhur

i'm no better lar

anws,

these are those who created more of an impression on me

hehs'

-jun yang,derrick,xin hui and silver-

yea and of cus

-weiliannn and kelly- !

they're all special in a way of their own.

2005-09-01T00:30:00.000-07:00

stayed home today
procrastinating in many stuffs still
-.-''
sighs

i'm back on mood swings again
getting irritated easily on and off
i don't know why sometimes;
i hate humans[tho i'm one too]
yea whatever ~
gonna try to go school tomorrow!
sighs
suddenly feeling pissed off and vexed.
pls anyone,when i say leave me alone,do so alright.
i'll usually know better than anyone else when my emotions are taking control over me.
so pls,take my words esp when i'm serious.
an easy going and cheery person i am often shown as,
but there's always a limit aights!
smile*

had been anticipating in many things i reckoned
i think i'm ain't independent and bold enough,really!
sighs
wanna drive out a new life but i'm back in the same circle,always!

utterly dissappointed by those words
i really wished it'll be fulfilled
nobody knows how much i desires for 'that' yea
perhaps becus i've been putting up a false front and 'don gif a damn bout that issue' bahs
anws,i'm not going much into details
i don't wanna say much to anyone bout it
well,if anyone who come across here is concern or worried,
don't alrite,
its ain't anything serious that i couldn't take =)

urggggggggg

2005-08-31T01:32:00.000-07:00

went school's teachers day celebration 2day
hees
den bedok,
bugis,
ms,
tamp,
and finally home now!
=)

small gathering with lamerz -shu nai nai and gui neng!
also lover jane-ny!~all da way~
Love her loads
hurhur

ade's having trouble in releationship again
sighs
all of us were so worried and sad too
gal,pls
don't do silly stuffs okie
there's so many stuffs in life not done
therefore,
never ever think of ending your life just by some setbacks
et budds are always here for ya !
*huggs*

i miss him
but i'm afraid to see him
or even contact him
heees
anws,its okay lar
=)
jun chaooooooo!!!
pervert ade got his name and photo even
-.-''
LOLs
he danced sooo darn cool and dashing
omfg
=p
wahahas!
shhh~

well,
maybe,
i'm trying to use substitute?
or jus deceiving myself bahs.
whatever,
i'm okay.

tired' tired
Zzz
nites fellows ~

2005-08-30T00:25:00.000-07:00

grrr

didn't managed to get up to shool today

went elias with mummy

trim eyebrows and etc

* SHE PAID *

whoo

thanks for everything lar

hees

but i don't know why

we just can't click toooo well yea

whatever,

i'm always loving ya allll

went ade's house and jane's there too

i supposed a 'Dai Ji' is coming huhs

LOL

long no such stuffs already yea

i do think there are faults in us too

but hey'

they are really ~~~

okay,forget it.

just hope nothing big will come outta it

its our last year in school already and its worthless for such things to happen aights

then,

went k-boxing with jane at bout 7pm

-gosh-

just the two of us

hahas

okay lar,we ' enjoyed too.

met up with ting and so on for a while

=C gal,gonna spent more time tgt aights

and yes,i do see initiatives and 'trials' lar

was frightened upon hearing and recalling some stuffs

scared the hell outta jane too

*giggles*

but i still dared to take a bus back and walked that long sickening path home

*claps*

-.-''

yea,that's how lame i am!

argh

i suspect that there's something wrong with my immune system

errr

peeps,tc of your health aights

its precious and important

far-fetched compared to wealth and so!

after these time,

i realised,

i'm still awaiting.

>.<

2005-08-29T20:45:00.000-07:00

i'm tired
went school 2day till the end !!
*yipee*
all the way till 5pm + ..
due to after school's mock exam [maths paper 2]
feeling the sense of urgency for o'lvl ready
but still,
there's ain't much i'm doing huhs
hurhur.
still promised to attend school regularly
-.-''
i must and i can yeap!
hehes
>.<
try lar!

am so tired
i just wanna be myself
-pls-
felt 'bastard' at times
felt foolish
felt being too kind and ended up taken for granted
tolerant; i am usually,
to the extend that i find myself '
no longer able to express out my thoughts with the right feelingss
sighs
i don't seemed to be happy nor sad
angry nor jealous
=X
i'm feelingless now..
wahhaaas
sighs
it all seems so temporary and fake at times
that's somehow why,
ppl chose to give up in life?
haas
i really can't live alone!
i need you guys real heart and concern too.
cold as i appear to be,
i'm not.
i am easily bothered by what ppl says bout me
mistook me for/as..
its just that
i chose to ignore it all.
and and,
i still chose to!

hecked it all ?
i'll try
closing an eye might be the key to survive in this society?
=C

sometimes,
ppl often thinks that they had grown up,
they had seen thru things,
but,
its just the starting of learning.
its a long journey in life,
there's many stuffs outta.

2005-08-28T15:05:00.000-07:00

oh man
i really regretted my day spent yesterday
everything went wrong for me in particular
but still,
i've tried my best not to spoil things already aights
sighs

anws
the dance is over
a lil unbearable but
every beginning has an ending yeap =X
shouted alot during the performances
its was so 'rendezvous' i'll tell ya
really..the atmosphere is *high* yea
the raps,dances,singings and all..
*claps*
for the time-being,
i'll never forget those streetzers-hip hoppers man
lols
they are so cool
and and
they dance really well !
esp the 'no hat de'
wahahas
can we exchange contact details?~?
OMG
hahas..guess we'll never meet again =C
never mind~
let fate decides
haas' =>

sometimes
i don't even know myself
what i want?
and worse,
who am i?
i don't seem to be expressing myself
in a way i'll do,
and that's a negative one
sighs

life's is always like this
be optimistic
=)

2005-08-26T02:12:00.000-07:00

finally dragged myself to school today but =X

ended up late and went in school only bout 11am

-gosh-

gonna face this and that

reporting around with 101 excuses

hees

Then,

- we -

jane,ade,ivy,renee,xuan qing,yuting and me =)

had our dance rehearsal at bout 7.30pm

-.-''

i lied to em' that we gotta reach at 6.30pm

and guess what?

we're still late!!

haas'

overall its not bad lahx

just the speed of our movements and positioning spaces bahs

seemed that we're lacking some sort of courage and confidence

hmmms

And,there was this group of 5 ppl in the dance catergory too

and omfg'

THEY DANCED BEYOND EXPECTATION!

real hip hop dancers i'll say

having competitions ard too

-gosh-

really nice

they totally brought up the whole atmosphere man

sobs

feeling so inferior compared to them

lols

motivates me to work towards dance more

arghhhh

so shocked and glad;happy~

but it was just a silly mistake

arghhh

tho dissappointing which was unexpected to be

-.-''

its funny too yea

but but

why why..

humf =X

2005-08-23T17:55:00.000-07:00

felt so bad

promised my classmate -johnathan- to go gymming with him for like about 1 month?

-.-''

and i always din make it to school or so.

hey' i'm really sorry aights

will make it up one day

tried going to school despite it was already 9am

but was really tired and sunny out there which contributed more to the idea of sleeping =P

and so,i did just that~

wouldn't be having time to go gymming after school this week i guess

as the dance is coming up this fri already

therefore,i'll probably do it next week

hehs

i'm trying hard to set a goal in life and aim for it

i've always been contradicting myself between this and that

i really must find one and settle on it yupz

my cousin's sick

heard she's down with fever last night

good gracious

take care alright

*huggs*

sighs

i simply can't make myself to study

even on the fact that there's only two more months to go and its o'level

-.-''

sometimes,seeing that my classmates are making so much efforts and improving on their studies each day

i'm happy for them yet sad for myself

sighs

i really gonna do something bout it yea *

hmms

jun ar jun

you'd better come to school soon and have regular keep ups aights

make it a must and a need

feel the sense of urgency okay

o'levels is just round the corner

you wouldn't get remarkarble results just by sitting back liddiz yea

do something now

instead of being poor in our attendance and share the same 'lazy' thinking

we shall help each other to buck up aights

let's try tgt

only 3 months to go

fight it out man

and pls do keep what you say =C

its quite annoying huhs

say go but always 'bastard' me

oh,poor me!

hehs hehs

sorry,i had to publish this!

the dance performance is coming up

two more days from now

hope we'll able to produce wonderful results =)

and and

after this friday performance

we're done with one 'project' yea

tho bound to kindda miss it

but

its a good stress out for me huhz

sucess to it and all other catergories of performance

*youth rendezvous day*

life ain't smooth sailing

its always filled with obstacles and challenges

in terms of mentality and physically

but as long as you believe you could go thru it

you'll certainly can!

i'm okay and i can smile and laugh

but i don't know what's wrong

i'll just feel better sulking and crying

lols

fret not,its mostly when i'm alone under the moonlight

haas

god knows what's bothering me soo much too

argh

yea..maybe i've bottled up tooo many stuffs

don't be too suprised one day when i'll stopped saying things

dad

if you got nothing better to say

don't say

sobs

it'll just makes the both of us upset right

everday speeches and calls i know;

are filled with concerns

but

it just ain't right

sighs

but always

i'll love and appreciate having this family

you might never see this point of mine

2005-08-21T00:20:00.000-07:00

dad and mum

pls be loving and happy

esp dad,tc of yourself pls

stop drinking and smoking sooo much

eat when you're supposed to aights

sighs

i want all of ya to be healthy and happy!!

i simply don't know how to show my love and concern to this family

feeling really stress bout these stuffs at times

oh man,i wanna concentrate fully on my coming o'lvl

pls don't add on any troubles to me aights

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

life has its ups and downs

to go through it is the only choice

there's no alternatives

you can only chose to stay down or get up

take a rest if ya must

but not give up!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Someone told me this before

[[ learn to be single and strong

free your mind of such thoughts

they can flow in without you knowing but once you realised you're thinking about these stuffs

immediately seek control and change your thoughts to more important stuffs like,

how to improve your family ties

how to improve yourself

how to make your family and yourself happier and the passion you have

it may seem harder at first as you'll prefer to let the thoughts flow

but as you strike in descipline,

you'll soon be taking control over yourself

and

happiness and peace of mind will follow... ]]

______

____

so,do ya peeps find this meaningful?

=) i do..

however,it also shows me that this person is afraid to be in love again

maybe bcus of the past hurts and so..

and he'd always be the gurdian angel of others

and appears to be so alright at all times

i hope you really are okay ~

if you ain't

we-your friends and so-are around too aights =)

-----

----

---

well,

this someone is special to me in a way

i really hope he won't be dropping by my blog and see these

i'll be so ~~~,if he does ..

anws,i really dont think he would too =) phew!

====

===

i am so bothered but i behaved not in the least

cus

i don't want any awkwardness

and actually,

it's ain't anythg too serious i take too

sweet and bitter

neutral and normal

i'm taking easy as possible

do feel peaceful aights'

>.<

Hmmms

i feel that its so 'ahem'

if he sees those

he's bound to feel soo 'urms'..

in any case.

if you really do come across ,

pls don't feel that i'm so in LOvee with you aights

jus a nice special friend

i don't really know you well enough seriously

and everythg

i'm not close to your life either

and we ain't contacting much too

take care yea

head for your direction in life

wish you sucess in having your own labortory and so on yea

many words to say

many doubts

many things

but i'll just leave it in my heart

and let it out through the beats

2005-08-20T17:05:00.000-07:00

had another dance practice ytd

as usual,late coming occurs and the dance is still in a so-so state =C

after that we went down to tamp for some bites

and there was 2 person offering to show us magic ~LOL

and we entertained em'

hahas..cool lahs actually!

was alil amazed!

*applause*

afterwhich,we headed down to MOS

there was me,jane,angela,adeline,jolene,another adeline,hailun,xiao wei,my 'cousin and 3 or

whom i don't know de.

-gosh-i brought my cousin along outta of no choice

was damn worried bringing her along cus'

if anythg happens,i'll have to be responsible and i don't wan anythg to happen to her yea!

well,she was allowed in in the end with a pinch of suspect from the bouncer

but i think,he close one eye bahs =P

danced thru the night man..

almost dehydrated!!

LOL

and there are some shameless girls shouting off ugly words outta nowhere

-gosh-ya really looked ugly like this okay.

spoil your image tyrantly.

was really tired and that's why i headed back home after clubbing

also din wanted my cousin to be too tired out

besides,there's another dance practice the following day~ZZz

and the rest headed off to lau pat sat

hees..sorry lahs =)

going to my grandma house later on to celebrate her bd =)

really tired

caught only bout 4 hrs of sleep =X

sighs

gonna study and do up my stuffs tmr

hope i'll do it =P

[ting]

sorry !

sighs

we care and we love you

don't think up too much aights

...

....

.....

i miss him loads

feel so lousy!

sighs

2005-08-18T10:55:00.000-07:00

attended school twice this week but both half shift =X
wanna try to improve on it..really.
sighs
my science is terrible!
i dunno a shit bout it ! =X
anws..life's isn't really going my way
i seemed to be a different and ever changing person
sorry ..sighs
i don't know what's bothering me too
i just know that i'm unhappy
but nbm,i'll get up soon ! =)

having a dance practice later
i hope everythg's gonna work well
mon is the rehearsal lerhs
and fri is performance day liaos
get prepared wor
and jane-ny
good lucks for your current exams oh
study hard
ya can de !
same to the rest aights x)

life is really unpredictable
ya'll never noe what will happen in the next second
so,cherish every moment

i miss ya
i really do
argh
feel so low class
how can i be in this state of mind?
-gosh-
maybe after some time,
i'll realise its ain't like what i thot it to be bahs
tc

2005-08-17T16:10:00.000-07:00

i don't feel good

i really don't

-.-''

2005-08-16T23:10:00.000-07:00

went late to school today delibrately
to skipped PE
with ade'jane'jun and coincidentally-danial'=)
and guess what,i did not attend any lessons all the way untill about 11~
gosh
why in the hell am i sent to school??
-.-''
got lectured by a few teachers
sighs
i noe my problems better that ya alll
i really hope to try to study by myself and come only for exams.
yea,maybe that'll be a wrong decision
but still,it beats going to school once a week
and get called up often for that yea.
i'm just trying to save 'us' from unecessary troubles x)

anws,did my eng o'lvl oral today
its quite hard okay~
i do not noe why in the hell i said i wanted to be a
ZOO KEEPER for my job during the conversation part-.-''
well,and i has to go on and elaborate..goodness!which i did~
quite funny-my personnal perception and based on the examinor expression-=0
the way i went about the picture description and all..
there was a part wherby i said that i couldn't see if that person was a man or lady -.-'
LOL
hope i'll still be able to score well and of cus,same to my frens too.

still thinking if i should go to school tmr as i promised
-.-''
i really dreads going to school
urgg
save me outta of these shitss
but for good results,
i'll persist on =)

your name simply looks very prominent in my eyes
imu dude!=)
sighs

unhappy still
tired still
but
happy and cheerful lil me always will be
tolerant to a limit,pls dont go beyond aights
i dun wanna be bad!=X
huggies*to frens hu needs that !
haas,there are i noe~=)
tc

2005-08-15T20:15:00.000-07:00

din went to school again
i don't know what i want
tmr having eng o'lvl oral
for that,no doubt i gotta go yea =C
good lucks to all ~!

all of a sudden
i've nth much to mention here
been in a self isolation lately
unless pressed to come out =X
wanting to do much
but i couldn't
-wth-

been thinking of you all the time
all this while
ya did not left my mind
neither did ya really entered my heart much
but i know,imu! =X

sometimes i feel that being too nice to ppl is sucha mistake
simply bcus
some ppl tends to take that 'nice' of you for granted
and worst still,being unappreciative
urgg..that really pissed me off !
but asking me not to bother bout any of that kindda em'
i can't really do so !
cus' i love em'
=)

i just wanna be myself !

Still Tired

2005-08-14T23:30:00.000-07:00

i really don't know why
the thought of going to school makes me feel damn -.-
i know i should fight it all out for this is the last year
but i'm simply tired and whatever~
going to school is like wasting of time to me
i'm just there to have that tick for my attendance
i really don't learn much
well,isn't anyone's fault seriously
it all lies in me -.-'' sighs

been quite busy for the upcoming dance performance on aug 26
arrrgh
we don't seem to dance as well as the previous one
maybe,gals,alil more effort is needed yea !
hope in the end,we reap what we sow and see the fruits of labour ~

i know its a lil funny to say this as it is something for sure
but still i wanna say
i love my family the most !!!=)
peeps,they are the real ones that will be with you thru ups and downs eventually
cherish and treasure them well aights
sometimes,they might seems to be interfering too much,
irritating us frequently and so &*^%^$*%$
but still,deep down in their heart,they love us!
believe in that.
and you'll feel that you're blessed in a way or so.
tho some might think otherwise,but still
the blood bond is always there yea!

and of cus,my friends too!
maybe not really all,
but i'm sure its almost all.
i love ya guys man !
-*ebudds*4i bunch*cool6*pri hangs*bk club*and a lil here and there*=)
take care all.
tho some might not be in contact
but still,
i've always treasure all of ya and its up to now.
in my heart,none had left!
yea,i'm sentimental okay!
=)

had many mood swings
and overall,i'll conclude that i'm unhappy
yes i am unhappy for whatsoever reasons in life
but
i'll not be a boring freak that keep quiets the whole day pulling a long face =X
sighs
got c5 for my mother tongue's o'lvl
and i think i'm re-taking
simply bcus i think,i can do better
hehes

i really dislike,i only said dislike,i don hate..=)
i really dislike peeps who are such posers,hyprocrites and so.
being inmature in the sense of thinking and 'doings' for their age
and i don mean small stuffs like eating mac's happy meal and
jumping ard at the age of 16 ..lols
i mean stuffs like-break friendships*wtf*,angry don talk whole day blah blah..
stealing,scampering,gangsterisms and so..
sighs
grow up and change for a better if ya are one
be a nice person aights
and the world will be much better =) ya can do it!
cus all of us has a heart
we have feelings and no one is born to be bad!
of cus,i'm not perfect too.
everyone has flaws.
=) okay,stop preaching la.

seen the maid
not bad !
lazy go into details
anws,here's a lil script for having two rows of our own mates ! lols...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
we::auntie,18 tickets of the maid pls!
auntie:: @_@ ..oo k kk,18 uh?!
we::yesh!x)
next person::2 tickets of the maid pls,
auntie::sorry,they bought up all the remaining tickets
we::HAHAHAHHAHAHA !!
okay,that was bad but cool ~~ hees

i'm glad
that somehow,
we kept in touch again~
but i noe
it might not last
still,it dosent matter
fate decides yea =)
i'mhappythatigotyainmylifeasapart
cheers to friendship !
you're special to me in a way =)

there's school tmr --Awww--
photo taking session on too
cant really miss that out yea
last year and all~
sighs
i'll really try to go !
and tues,there's eng o'lvl oral
arghhh
i still want breakssssssss !
^.^

unhappy tho,
i'll smile =)

2005-08-13T01:15:00.000-07:00

know me once again

if ya din know me enough

enough !

i'm tired ~

2005-08-11T11:37:00.000-07:00

i cried during flag raising,
in class,
while walking,
i kept crying
and i don't know why
=C
i'm sad
i'm lost
i'm unhappy
sorry but
don't ask me why
cause i really don't know
tell me anyone
tell me if you know
but dun worry too much frenz
it'll be over soon
i'll be okay soon
glynnis,dry the tears !
you're alright

2005-08-10T10:53:00.000-07:00

yawnS
yesterday was sg birthday ~
went to angela's 2nd 'home' to catch those fireworks and had a bbq too
her house bs so cool i tell you
but well,her dad decided to let that house out =C
its is on 22nd storey,and it had a rooftop and long windy balcony
nice scenery and many toilets..
lols..its just so cool ~ =)
but sad to say
she cried out due to many probs
it was so sad i'll tell ya
we were all so worried and in a lost too
the security guard-indian auntie-=X
damn kp..argh ! bud still i noe she's just doing her job too.
sighs
afterwhich,we went down to east coast park
with jane's dalls company and shuyi they ~
quite dissappointed that we-eternally buddies-didn't get to gather up !=C
slacked there all the way till dawn and took a cab home with my dear lil cousin =)
so nice to have her here with me =) *huggs*

still feeling stress for the dance and everythg
-school,friends,life,family,my personal finance etc .!-
seems like its hard to gather all tgt at a time to get the moves all done
sighs
its okay la
i'll do what i can bah =/

loves all the ones by my side =)
take care all dudes
i loves ya too
=)
in terms of friendship sistership brotherhood alright
dun go stupit
hahahs

afer some time of waiting
i got it
a smile carried by me
'till i sleep
tho ya dunno
ya woke me up
-today-
contradicting myselff
i wan very much to call
but i'm feeling kindda awkward
i dunno why,i really don't
but i noe if i call,it'll be somethg good
=)
just friends
dun worry ^peace^

i really dun wish to go school but i has to
arghhh
so many things to do and so little time left
its always like this~

2005-08-07T06:44:00.000-07:00

gosh-
how do i use words to show my feelings and thots...?
been stressed and vexed..
hectic schedule it is but aimlessly
alone i took the responsibilties of all
initially,i was thinkin that i shall jus wash my hands off these plannings
and would want ya gers to noe how frustrated it is to be the organizer~
only then,you'd be able to noe and understand my unexplainable feelings.
sighs
but i pondered,i shoulden do that
it'll all goes down the drain
everythg might be spoilt bcus of me throwing temper
so i'll now declare that i'll be responsible and continue doing these farking plannings-.-''
hopping to see the fruit of our labour after all =)
hope ya gers can really cooperate and dont think that i'm throwin trantum anyoldhowly yeap
i'm not..you are not me.
ya wun really understand thruly de
so dun say till its some bloody easy shits that i'm kicking a big fuss about aights
if ya really think it is,ya do the jobs.deal?
in fact,i've been tolerant
i dun scold,i jus nag a lil
i dun show attitudes,i jus be a lil harsh =P
pls do see my efforts in being nice
no offence pls'
=C

i dont seemed to be able to speak and express myself as good as b4 anymore
i dunno how to pursuade my sister 'ting to go school as often as she was b4
i dunno how to let my family understan how much i love and treasure them
i dunno how to handle things as easy as b4 too
but,i'll not fall just like this cus' i'm glynnis *
i'll try my best to pick things up and move on as b4
=)
ya peeps too
dun give up easily aights=)

words not said
things not done
lies made up
in a world of mine

note this ppl::
nobody can help you when you're in desire straits
only ya yourself can really do that help'
cus nobody can be you
nobody~~

2005-08-06T13:23:00.000-07:00

sudden lost of words when i've so much to say
tired' still
that dance plannings is putting me in a fix once' again
gals,hope ya understand how troublesome and stressful is it for me aights
bud still,i see the efforts from all of ya too lar..*muacks*

ting's raffles stuff is also making her so damn sad and unhappy at times
sis,dun worry.
the fated ones will join bahs.
go on searchin tho its dissappointing that we might not be the ones.
and we lub you.
pls' gal,dun think too much negatives aights =)
and taking private's not easy pls'
why not stay on till we graduate tgt?
you'll regret not cherishing our last year spending tgt de =C
life's is full of goods and bads
happy and sads
still,ya has to move on aights
so move on positively and smile amap[as much as possible]=)

::iliedtocoverafact::
well,ya asked me yea?
i'll reveal it here..
there's no jason !!
if ever you'd come across,you'd noe
bud i'm not pinning any sort of hope aights.
admit i do miss ya
but i miss many others too !-shuyi'gui nan'angela'jolene'hailun'jonathan'firdaus'-and moRe !!
=)
things just dun seemed to be like the past
tho nth really happened
the feelings ~ and blah -.-''

i hope everyone's fine
happy
and contented =)

my attendance is not improving i noe
sighs
my studies is not picking up too
my life has not changed to spendin more splendidly either
glynnis
what precisely do ya want?
what am i waiting for?
god knows ~
-.-''

2005-08-04T23:46:00.000-07:00

argh
i just woke up
from 6pm till now 11plus
oh dad,i cant sleep now
can i be excused from school tmr?~=)

I'M STILL NOT STUDYING
glynnis!~~!
sighs
findin a aim in life
what shall it be?
dancer?beauticianist?accountant=.=?
haas..

i'm stress
i'm ves
i'm crazy
i'm devilish
i'm angelitic
i'm caring
i'm cold blooded
i'm glynnis -

2005-08-03T18:35:00.000-07:00

dragged myself to school today
weet
was unhappy and don felt like talking but i'll simply get carried away seeing them all =)
my studies is really in a pile of shitt
wasting my time everyday and not studying
thinking of opting to private candidate but its no easy task yea~
i'll never touch book for as long as i'm not in school =P
sighs
can someone guide me? =C

been rather easy irritated and pissed off nowadays
but i don really shows it out
pms? =.=

tears and smiles
laughters and cries
angers and regrets
lies and truths
dreams and reality
sorrows and happiness
etc
-life-

would be wiser to be glad of what you have now than to regret over what you've lost

2005-08-02T14:10:00.000-07:00

din went school again =X
tired'
teacher called up this time =C
argh
what ever it comes,i'll face it bah =)

jane din went school too
and yupp,meijun too
haiyos..~
jun,better buck up and dun be too stress out alright?
always here fer you =)

planning to
do up some chores as my house is really in a mess now,as usual =X
and go buy dot ~ and then for a swim bahs
will or not..still pending lohs. . LOL

mom's sick
have a really sore throat
her voice is totally ~~
hais
hope you'll get well soon okay ..
*muacks*

2005-08-01T18:50:00.006-07:00

=.= skipped school today
was late and met ting up fer breakfast and..she dua-ed me ! LOL
slacked,k-boxed,pizza treat and a lil shopping..
haiy0
and yupp gal,study and stay on for this last 3 mths bah
tho you're really capable of irritating me easily without fail and i dunno y
i L u alort still =)
have trust,confidence and hope aights

really tired still
it seemes to me that no matter how much of rest is still not sufficient ya noe
sighs
seen her' today
not bad =)
will be quite a good catch bah ~
i wanna give up lerhs
so ,dun come into my life my heart nor my mind anymore aights =C
well,it'll takes much time tho

tears kept rolling down my cheeks uncontrollably
b4 i sleep and when i wake up
in the bus,when i'm alone,or even walking.. .. *sobs*
what's wrong with me?
i don seem to be expressing myself correctly
i'm struggling hard with my emotions but somehow,they'll win
and that's when i shouted and cried to my mom and my dad~
i'm really sorry
thousands apologises in my heart ~

perhaps i'm feeling really stress and vex to many stuffs
perhaps ya guys could look beyond my smile,i'm not really happy too okay
i'm always trying to help and talk to ppl who are unhappy and etc
but who can really talk to me when i'm down?
in fact,tho i guess no one realises,but i'm really down nowadays
its always when i'm alone..
my emotions are out v.v

i'm still tired and lost -.-''

ni yong yuan bu dong wo shang bei
xiang bai tian bu dong ye de hei
ying wei ni bu shi wo
er wo ye bu dong gai zhem mo bia da

2005-07-31T19:02:00.000-07:00

reached home in the mornin
slept bout 9am till 6.30pm
thinkin if i shld join jane,ivy and shu hua to sing at safra?
i wan but am tired and lazy leh~
well..mayb i'll give it a miss bah =(
gonna prepare stuffs for school and do some hwks?
argh
totally not studying still

everytime my hp beeps,
or when i open my eyes in da morning,
i'll reached to it anxiously,wishing it'll be you,
but i'm always dissappointed !

2005-07-30T18:30:00.000-07:00

went to ade's chatlet yesterday
ton?yeap !
hmmms..its was alright lahs
quite fun ~

so damn tired now
just woke up and i am oblinged to go work again !
argh

anws..gal,hope you've had a nice bd this year =)
and pls stop about him lahs
=X
make me so -paiseh-
came to realize we buddies are still in very good terms tho we had lil times tgt nowadays
mus work on the dance soon liaos wor
i dunno what to blog suddenly
my mind's blank
too much to say if i were to elaborate
so here i end for today =)

liking someone can be one sided
it dosen't needs the another one to do anythg de

2005-07-28T04:30:00.000-07:00

being stuck in between can be really frustrating at times ya noe
so messed up =X
i don't have splitting ability
so pls give me time for all of ya aights =.=

[ting]
i don't know why are you giving attitudes and all..
didn't you say that the raffles stuff needs lots of patience and persistence
you're already sort of giving up on us liao lorr
if so,how are ya going to move on?
i know it can be so frustrated that we always can't make it when we said we could
sighs
but still, can ya have a more positive and open attitude and thinkin?
dun try to bottle things up and think its okay aights
we are trying to do our part too and i believed ya noe that i changed alot towards u yea?
so,why are you behaving like that?
and pls,die die die..what only~
stop it..i really hope you're okay.
sighs
alot of stuffs i wanna say but i don't know how lahs

going for tuition later
really tiredd
argh
but life still has to go on
since so,why do we have to make ourselves miserable?
=.=

2005-07-27T21:13:00.000-07:00

Zzz
yawns
tiredd

so many things undone
so many words not said
so many people with so many lies
and so many friends
i chose them fer my lifetime mates =)
[[+se eun+tingting+ivy+hailun+adeline+jane+]]
eternally buddies(ebudds) are a group of loyal,true,kuailan,attitude,rash,smart,sensible,cute,kind,jokable,friendly and ETC !!
never will i finish decribing us cus we simply are too super =)
ade's bd next..hahas..finally able use your ic chiong liao hor..
kekes..wish u haf a happi bd this year
we'll be with u thru the night de laaa..=)

i'm feeling rather empty in my mind right now
but still,i wanna blog blog blog ..
hehes
studyyy~
pia ah chiong ah
0'level~
sighs
really not prepared and not making efforts yett =C

why mus ya always barge into my mind suddenly
argh
=X
i wished ya could tutor me for preparation of o'lvl yea ~
x)
i noe i should give up
but
i'd still like to hold on fer a while
thinkin and waitin fer my dream to be a reality?
somehow,its enough
as fer the other ya whom i'll see often enough if i werk la,
its enough just to haf fun we'd always haf bah..
=) not wanting much bahs ~

2005-07-26T19:15:00.000-07:00

i din go to school again =.=
and no mc..
arghhh

spent my day playing and slacking outside man
hais
din do anythg much,again!

she left me alone
she walked out on me to work
she gave me no reasons but just ' i dunno ' , ' sorry ' ,' dun say lerhs ' =.=
i din ask much too
din say much
din pursue futhur
but i'm feeling rather upset deep inside..
i really do,gal~
sighs^

i feel damn farked up with my life
the plannings
the stuffs i wanna do but hasn't done yet
everythg~
argh...

can ya ppl gimme a break sometimes?
i'm really tired okay.
sighs

2005-07-25T13:53:00.000-07:00

sick?
yes i am.
gosh
cough,flu,a very soar throat and a slight fever
well,no body in my family really believed that
as i'd always give these as an excuse in not going to sch yeap~
howeva,i din went sch still =)
and the teachers will come knocking on my door soon i guess
argh'waDEva =.=

dearest lil cousin baobeii..
i'm here wishing you and him happiness
truly hope you both will overcome all odds
i'll catch up with you on how things came between you and HIM..
gosh..he's my bloody fren and it was really unexpected
anws,look forward bravely and forgo the past.
ther are bound to have a certain of difficulties and unhappiness but if you really loved each other,i believe it'll be okay.
==take care new couple== :)

i truly dislike hearing
'i love you FOREVER,you're my one and only one i'll love FOR LIFE,i love you more THAN ANYTHING,blah blah blah.....'
well,to support my statement is the fact that i've seen so many couples breaking up even when so many of such words are said,the promises and so..
this kinda freak the shit outta me to get into a releationship okay
and if i've decided to be with a guy,you're lucky i'll tell you.
wahahas--whoops-
okay okay,there might be a few exceptions ~
AND
guys,if you really like that ger,and you wants her so much
you can pledge your love fer her to be so damn true and deep
but if she ask you to wait fer her for 10 freaking years..
regardless of wadeva reasons ah
how many of you would remain unchanged huh?
well,probably 1 out of 1000 aights.. =.=
so now tell me
what's your perception of true love forever??

and i believed almost all our parents will had already divorced if they are without children
its the responsibility they are still tgt up to now =majority=

why am i saying such things
i dunno too
just came to my mind suddenly
wanted to censored it all off but kinda waste time if i do so yea?
so,jus leave it bahs.

gtg now to see a white dressed man/women who will tel you a few child's words
then
give you some m&ms
you then get your receipt to give your sir/mdm.
solved for the absents =)

2005-07-24T16:31:00.000-07:00

i'm really tiredd ...

mentally and physically ...

who can understand all these ...

nah,i guess its only myself~

there's a feeling to resist i noe
dont think too much and it'll be okay
ya rest well,its a long night
lalala~

missing all my dear friends who had stepped into my life b4 and had left
or,is about to.. ... ... [v.v]
take care on your path

if you're sick,do take good care aights.
dun let yourself fall.

2005-07-23T19:08:00.000-07:00

woke up at 2plus unintentionally =.=
the calls and all..argh!
was supposed to work at 3pm but i'm simply toooo tired lor..
slept at bout 5am man!!~

then,used the comp again fer awhile
and,watch vcds thruout my lunch..hees
its a nice show lor..-my date with a vampire 3-so touching and blah..
it's simply nice overally.
then sms came,my mgr desperately needs ppl to work and so,i do the good guy's role and agreed lor =.=
so,i'll be working later at 11plus til morning.[v.v]
but at least,its him i'll get to work with lor..wahahas..
glynnis ah glynnis~~ =))
well,nth much lar,tho i've liked him b4 but its the fun we creates out makes me enjoy with him more bahs.
haas..actually,i dunnos if i've stopped liking him now.ah..wadeva..no matter wad isit,i'm not doing anythg bout these.
you and you..the J's..hais-its the same,i'm not gonna do anythg.=C

i'm planning to do up some chores yea?
much ants from dunno wher and odours from bins are coming..oWwW ~
then,settle some other stuffs and if time allows,gonna mit jane up at tamp bahs.=)

i wanna stop looking up but it had already turned to be a habit
i simply cant refrain myself whenever i has the chance to..
time past
i came to realize you are just like them..
nth special
i'm gonna forgo you too aights.
just a matter of time
budds,i'm alright =)

2005-07-22T03:55:00.000-07:00

what a tired day
well,schooled in the morning as usual~

went bugis in the afternoon fer somewhile
just walked alil that's it
then,went to raffles fer an interesting talk =)
ting,i'll consider it de and meanwhile pursuade the rest to go too.
dun lose hope yea?
it lasted 3 hours and i'm really trying hard to digest all the infos yeap..=P
i dun understand y ppl says its a scam and some even worse,they are inexperienced and yet they says that too.=X
- dun never eat grape say grape sour- =PpPPp
budds,do understand and trust ting bahs
even if we dun want and is not interested,dont pour the wet blanket over her k?=P
the least we could do is to understand her doingd more ba and she means us well too in trying to bring us in there
so,lets give her and yourself a chance lor..wont kill ryte?=)

afterwhich,we went SPARKS,out of no choice
was really tired by then but had planned well with frens lerhs so just went along lor
---argh---
was really bored and stuffy there
din really enjoy lor =X
felt it as a wasted trip man
waste money and energy
and i din eat at alll...lunch and dinner gone,plus supper.=.=
arggg..what a day~ (v.v)

ai wei,what are you doing and thinkin?
okay,currently..we-jane and family: are looking fer you
worrying and swearing at the same time =X
what's wrong huh?
well,i've no idea what to do or say also lah ..hais
you better not sink deeper on the wrong way yea?
we need a talk
dun avoid anymore
we really need to talk
please know this::i'm always the glynnis i used to be when you are troubled or ~~~
if ya need a shoulder or ear,i'm,or rather,we are always prepared to offer de lor

are you bothered more only when you knows that person likes you?
okay fine,i likes you and i've no wish to do anythg bout it
well,again,i'll let time take these away i guess
i miss your messages outta a sudden and greetings,the lameness and all...
but so?haas..ferget it~
howeva,sometimes i feels that it's just a puppy crush.
argh..wtf ryte?!
kaiwen asked me::ya really wanna let him go?
well,its not fer me to let go or not,i've no right to,cus i din got ya at all in the first place yea?
but one thing i noe clearly is to concentrate fully on more impt stuffs such as studies!!
its really shitty ~
96 more days to that paper that i've been waiting fer 10 years~~=C

2005-07-21T19:32:00.000-07:00

i don't seems to undestand myself
so how can i expect people to understand me?
what do i want?
what am i doing and thinkin?
any kind soul,please let me understand myself if you think you really could.
recently.it had been like a movie flim that i'm acting in life
its like,i'm not being me
seriously,i still refrain myself from saying some stuffs in my heart out here as this is an online diary yea?
but,isn't a diary supposed to be all you feel?=.=

well,been wondering y am is still bothering to look up at your stuffs and things that could do with ya?perhaps,i would just liked to know all the abouts without you knowing bahs.
somehow,if i do find something releated to you somewhere there,i feel...~~~ jus ain't too nice

okay,you peeps might not understand,its alright.
felt that i've been a sensitive and emotional freak nowdays.
time to let it rest glynnis//

0o sometime it feels no one understands o0
o0 i don't even know why i do the things i do 0o

2005-07-20T20:54:00.000-07:00

just reached hme in school uni
went se eun's hz to do some maths after oral
hees
went to school fer oral exam only at 2-15
cant wake up lorr =P

i wanna studyyyyy
get good resultsss
helppp pls....
argh!

[there are words i wanna say,wanna ask but i chose to forgo
[why? i dunnos
[hope everythgs and evryone's alryte yea?
[luv ya gals ebudds!!

study study study!!
loads to catch up man.
cya folks..=)

2005-07-19T22:37:00.000-07:00

omfg
i just woke up and its..10.25pm!
from 5 pm .. in sch uni =.=

went to sch late deliberately today
skipped PE
hees,yeah,i'm lazy to move!
the guard sho kind,
opened the backgate fer us and told us not to get caught-yupp,i noe =P
hmms..find myself too behind in studies
i shoulden had missed so much lessons
now,it all seems italians to me..
i dun understand a single thgs
100 more days to o'lvl-gosh-gosh-gosh-
buck up everybody..
eng oral fer prelims tmr.
omg,i really dunnoe how to talk about a picture man
argh..
nah,so be it.=p

~letting go as time passes~

2005-07-18T21:20:00.000-07:00

schooled today too
wanna try to achieve one week's full attendance at least =)
was really tired
i slept thru many periods and was disturbed really much by my classmates-thx guys =X
had cramps again after school and i then went off during the break of the workshop =P
went to ade's house with jane,last min-ly,
and slept till abt 6pm?!
haas..went to look fer my parents and grab some bites tgt..
and off i went home while they ~~~ i dunnoe..*hees*
nth much lar today..=)

it's really time i study if i wanna pass my o'lvl yea?
shit man.
jus 100+ days and its here.
i'm wondering how will life be like fer me and frenz all next time.
how i'd like it to be i also don't know.-omg-
time to do some reflection and thinking yea? =.=
anws..studdy hard all graduating classes aights?
give your best for the best.

*****
i know clearly that i'm still thinkin of you
its not that i cant let go
i jus don't want to,yet?!

*****
se eun my budd,asked me today
if i still has feelings fer him
i hestitated
i'm really lost
feel that i'm sucha low class ger being in this state of mind
-sighs-

will get it alllll overrrr soon..
*smiles*

2005-07-17T23:59:00.000-07:00

i'm really tired but i still wanna blog~LOL
well,its liddat fer newbies yea..also bcus,i've spent a whole day out today bahs.=P

hmms..slept at 5am approximately aft the vcds..
and woke up at 8am next morning-ZzZ-
was obliged to.
haha..went for ycf[youth cultural festival]performance by soka at tao payoh stadium
well,was nice lahs and joyful.-claps to performers-=)
had JANE for company throughout today-muackies- ^.<
hmms..she's steady lor..returned late after clubbin but still make it-huggs-
after that,we went down to toa payoh inter fer some ^business^-wahahas
slack and went parkway to mit angela that stupit ger-whoops-=P
haas..drop by lun's workplace to see how retarded she is now-ahkaka-
den her manager/colleagues say my dressing nice..-wees-[yesh,i wanna HL lor,bleahs]hurhur
den shu yi that ah pek came after somewhile too-opps-
then we went to katong ktv
there was::
i,jane,angela,shu yi,jolene,xiao ben,ben,cheng ye,gui nan and lun-who joined later after work
kaos..chickens and cats man!LOL
you can hardly really hear singing,real singing...!
okie lar,havoc-ed tgt..
then,me and jane went on down to tamp.. ..
meet up with ivy,jackson,shu xiang and her fren,wei ming..oso noe liao la now..=)
oh yea,poor jackson..his skin is torn by bits..=X
by me,proud to say..LOL
hey' is you find fer it one lor..lalala~
we slacked too-omg-
dragged our legs as we walked down the streets..*hees
a sign of tiredness and sian yeap =P
then,settled down at 505 for prata servings..wahahas
that pig janeeeee's intention anw..
finally went back home..
jane acc me waited fer bus
kakakas...like we couple liddat..hahas
thx lah anws..nanny nanny poo poooo =X
wa..spent about 14 hrs outside..
and i'm really tired =.=
den reach home
wait'
stop ?
stop !
=)

in the bus while pondering
again,
i couldn't help it
i cried as i looked outta windows
listening to sentimental chi songs
(dramatic yea)=X
wtf glynnis..wtf
well,i hoped no one saw that..

2005-07-17T00:46:00.000-07:00

weet'
it is very rare that i didn't join in the fun with my buddies.
i've made the right decision today =)
i wanted to join them to club after working despite having cramps
but well,i didn't in the end after thinkin
well,was also lazy lar..*hees
but sho sad.
miss out the fun with them
i jus love hogging out with them,esp when its all of dem
so now,i'm gonna watch vcds again lor.
dad so good
came back just and cooked fer me bcus i told him i wanted to eatt
*touched*
aights..nth much today.
lazy ryte liaos..

is everythg going to stop now?
sighs
not gonna bother my heart too much into it
-smiles-
anws..we was tgt fer somewhile today =)
but,isn't he a past tense?
why am i still minding him?
^omg^
=X

2005-07-16T02:20:00.000-07:00

xxxx GROWLSSSSSSS xxxx

i've written thousands of words supposingly fer this post and jus when i was about to publish it
error~ ahhh,and it's gone!
damn it!!

well,was saying initially that i had my MT o'lvl listening paper today and it doesn't seemed to be.=X
din went out today tho i said i would meet along =P
took napS,eat,bathe,watch vcds all da way till 1AM!~ *hees*

well..i would like to say somethings to my family tho they wouldn't see it!
::mom::
i'm so sorry for my utterly unreasonable attitudes and frustrations i've vented on you at times
i really felt bad and hurt
i always slapped myself,tho was a light one,and reproach myself countless times
i know your good intentions in all your naggings,actions and continunous calls =X
i loves all of you in this family despite having all the disputes,quibbles and attitudes
its simply bcus,we are a family,we has each other blood in us!
sighs
i wished i could be a nicer daughter at times
in terms of attitudes showing,at least.
in my mind,i always know the sweet things and nice response i should had given you
but my mouth jus couldn't work with it. =.=but still,there are wonderful jokes between us. =)

::dad::
tho we hardly communicate,i love you as much too.
i know what you had done for me,oh well,for us.
i really appreciate having sucha father.
the love and concern is never shown out but i could feel it in my heart.
but similarly, i just having troubles being niceee regularly. =.=

::jie/ah ka/::
i really appreciate you sponsoring for my tuitions fees and so.
i'll try to not waste that effort of yours. *^.<
and,i really wish you happiness,true happiness.
living without worries,sorrows and fears.
ilu alot too of cus.
somehow,you really has a wrong kindda attitude huh.
i'm younger than you hello.LOL~
i hope he's really the right and good guy for you.
seeing you cry,i'm hurt too tho i seemed to heck care.
actually,i can talk to you too.any probs,cmon!muacks~

lastly,::kor/ahboi::
you ar you ar..omg!
we are the sort who dun even know we are in the house at the same time
not to mean that my house is big,in fact,it not.iits how much we neglect each other presence.
haas..quite funny lor but he cares for me and i cares for him too.
from the 'one-year-one-time' action can see de lahs..=X
hees..we used to fight alot,and i do mean fight!LOl
you're not bad just that you had too strong of a mind of your own.
and you tends to get frustrated easily due to &*%$#$^*( -wadeva it is-
but i'll say he's someone sucessful,determined to acheive what he wants.
that explains his over strong mind yea.*owww..
now he's currently in ns,take care aights.
erms..i dun miss you truthfully *wahahas*
but i loves you too -lar- =)

that's about it.=) i'm starting to have blurred visions now~

gals,i cant always be the gurdian angel 24 hrs there
do take care and be optimistic when thgs goes wrong.=)

sometimes i just couldn't curb my tears
it flows like a running tap if i decides to let it out
but afterwhich,what do i get?
just endless thoughts still.
good gracious glynnis,be strong!

2005-07-14T06:10:00.000-07:00

hey'
this is my very first post and of cus,blog too yea =)
hmms...so pardon me fer havin an lousy entry and keep ups okay?
today,schooling..whole day and tuition..omg..~
was onlie free after 8pm and on..
hmmms..i find that i'm wasting my time and slacking too much
well,i'll try getting out of hibernation soon..LOL
that's all bahs.lazy type liaos..
actuali,to be frank,i'm jus blogging fer the sake of blogging today
i wanna take a look at how it'd be..^.<